People look at YouTubers and Blogger, and they think, "Man, they have such amazing lives". They think our lives are so different from theirs, and filled with nothing but good times. But that is so far from the truth.
I know that on my channel, I should bring more of my life into the open; let people see exactly what goes on behind closed doors. Be truthful, etc. But truth be told, I think the truth would be hard for people to handle, and I don't want to make people uncomfortable, or make it seem like I'm trying to get sympathy.
Should I post it anyway?
Truth is, at the beginning of every month, my father frightens me. He gets hold of a medication he isn't prescribed, and when he takes it, it makes him angry.
My mother got a haircut for the first time in nearly 10 years and she looks beautiful! But all my father could say when she came in was, "oh, you got your haircut", and nothing else. The only other thing he could do was be an ass to her AND me because he was "forced" to eat leftovers. He didn't tell my mom what he wanted made, and he didn't ask for anything at the store, not to mention, with my tooth, I haven't felt well, and mom has been swamped taking care of paying the bills, shopping for food, clothes for him, etc, and all he can think of is himself. I actually cried the other night because he was so fed up with everything, but tonight, I cried for my mom because of him hurting her.
I used to imagine myself so far from here, and when I started gaining strength, I couldn't imagine myself anywhere but here. Now, I'm starting to think about taking a long vacation, and taking my mom with me.
I've always longed to go to Salem.
I shouldn't be unloading here. This is supposed to be happy. I've noticed people don't +1 my posts unless they're happy go lucky, but I'm tired of worrying about that. I'm going to do be me and just for it. See where it gets me.
But, whether to post it on YouTube? Not so sure about that.
Guess we'll see.
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