The steady drip of water echoes off the dark tiled walls, the lights having long since been extinguished. The chill in the air permeated the very soul, and would have sent most fleeing back to the warmth and the light. However, on this night, it was a blessing to one individual who had sought the solitude as a sanctuary, a haven where sickness could lay claim and everything you needed to combat it or ease it was close at hand.
Against the ivory skin, her brown hair was tied back into a lose bun, her eyes closed against the nausea and pain. Clad in only a dark grey t-shirt and a plaid pair of shorts, she'd curled herself into a ball on the dark blue floor mat, a towel in matching colors resting under her head to give support and what comfort it could offer. One hand rested against her belly,the other cupped gently under her cheek, the warmth in both having faded to natch the frigid environment. What had started as a not so pleasant day had now given over to a worse night, but if she could help it, he would nit find out. By the time he returned the next day, she would have ridden through the worst and be hiding behind a mask of makeup and hubris that only a trained eye would be able to penetrate. Thankfully, he hadn't yet been able to work behind the veneer when she was on point, and she was able to hide the lowest days, knowing the better would soon come.
That morning, she'd risen early, despite the pain and nausea, and made him a hearty breakfast of eggs, toast, three kinds of meat, orange juice, coffee, and tea. He was going to need his strength to face the day and night that was ahead, and before he'd left, he'd carried her into the living room and made love to her in front of a roaring fire. In that space of time, the sickness and pain had faded to wonderful bliss, and he'd left none-the-wiser to the turmoil raging within his soon-to-be bride.
As soon as his car has pulled away, and he'd sent the last of the loving text messages, she'd made it to the stairs before the pain settled in for another round. Her knees had given way, her hands catching herself on the carpeted incline. Her nails scored the fabric as she fought the urge to cry out, and she'd been able to pull herself up the stairs and into their bedroom. Two capsules of generic Pamprin and a few sips of water later, she took a moment to let the feeling in her legs return before she set about making their bed and putting the laundry in the basket. The pain continued its torment, but she knew that, for the time being, she'd have to ignore it. He had never once come home to a dirty house, chores waiting to be done, food not ready and waiting, or even soon to be ready, with a hot cup of coffee and a lively atmosphere to greet him. She'd promised herself to never be seen as her parents had once said she was, and she'd worked hard to maintain the reputation of strong against all odds. She would not give into her pre-existing condition when her self-esteem was on the line.
After folding the clean laundry and putting it away, she'd tried to eat, and yet, every piece of food that touched her lips tasted stale, flat, and somehow having decayed when it was freshly made. The smell alone was enough to turn her stomach on end. She managed to nibble some saltines while she vacuumed and dusted, but even that didn't sit long. By 3pm, she was running to the bathroom as her stomach heaved, and everything was quickly lost. She'd hoped against hope that it wouldn't continue, but now, as the midnight hour chimed on the grandfather clock downstairs, she realized how foolish it had been to hope when the odds were stacked against her. Now, all there was to do was wait, and hope the daylight brought relief, and the strength and courage to face it.
If she'd been stronger, faster, more accustomed to the monthly onslaught that had encompassed her life since the age of 20, she'd have hears the small "beep" that issued outside her home. She'd have been cognizant of the front door as it opened and closed. Even reacted to his voice as it called for her, and his quickened steps minutes later as he searched the unnaturally darkened household for his love, his heart racing when she neither spoke nor appeared. However, for once in her 30 years of life, she'd been forced to give power to her body, to let it ride out the storm, becoming as useless and limp as a store bought mannequin.
His steps came fast towards her, her eyes unable to open as the overhead light shone down. His hands were gentle but firm as he lifted her head onto his legs, the palm of his hand gentle tapping against her cheek to try to rouse her. Her voice issued in his panicked voice, begging her, pleading with her to wake up, to look at him, "please baby, please, wake up. Look at me".
In all their years together he had never come home early, his investigations keeping him away for a solid 24 hours at a time. On this night, she'd lost the upper hand, and would have to come clean to him about this condition, and every illness she;d tried to hide from him for the past year and a half that they'd been together. He would be hurt, maybe even angry with her for keeping secrets, but he also knew she was wary of letting people take care of her. Her parents had always stated that if people knew the truth they wouldn't stay, and she couldn't bear to be away from him for anything. Even if it meant her suffering alone in silence just to have him by her side, she would never break the image she'd given him of perfect health and radiance. But now, there was no hiding behind makeup, an image, or even an act. She was caught red handed, and would have tell her story.
Her eyes opened to take him in; his blue eyes shining down on her all the love he carried, his concern for her well being, but a relief that she was was back with him at last. She couldn't help but smile as his lips came down to meet hers, their rough but gentle caress sending pleasurable chills throughout her entire body. He knew well what his kisses, his very touch did to her, and it was a welcomed distraction from the ailments that still plagued her. She was once again safe, loved, and would be cared for until she was able to get back on her feet, and be the radiant and glowing love of his life once more.
As he pulled back to lay beside her, his hands stroking the away the tears that had fallen, she knew she was where she was meant to be, and would never again give in to the fear of losing his love and respect when he had shown time and again that no matter the days, the distance, the sickness, or the worst the world could offer, she was forever his one and only love, that would reside in his heart for all eternity.
FIN
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